“Only Two Choices”

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Everyone thinks
By making plans
Guarantees
Their future
Nothing is
Promised
To anyone
In this
Group delusion
This can all end
Immediately
Causing us to
Drop dead
Where we stand
So don’t think
You’re special
Over another
Live your life
To the fullest
And be a good person
It’s a do
Or die situation
On countdown
And no one
Knows the end game
It is his gift
To give
On how long
He will put up
With the ignorance
Of people
Stop pretending
We have control
Of life
It’s an illusion
We live in a world
Of judgement
With simple choices
Live
Die
Love
Hate
There is no room
To play
In the middle
We are all puppets
Dancing
To the tune
Of two
Grand master gamers
Be aware
All your choices
Dictates who is
Your controller
Either you
Choose God or Satan
To be
The keeper
Of your soul
This will be
The most
Important decision
You’d make
So don’t order
Like you’re
Buying a Starbucks
This is for
Eternity
An Infinitant decision
Nothing to be
Taken lightly

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Island Of Our Own”

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All I ask
Is that you
Promise
Yourself
That you
Will surrender
Your stress
Lock it up
Keeping it
Away from
This happiness
With both
Want to share
The pain you
Had before me
Don’t give
It so
Much control
Just
Direct all
Your senses
And
Concentrate
On us
Let’s stay
In our world
Our own piece
Of heaven
In the center
Of a
Complicated world
No outside
Madness
Will ever
Enter
What
Is outside
Stays outside
Where it can’t
Hurt us
Never
Destroying
What we’ve grown
This kingdom
Is no kingdom
Without this bond
I will always
Be your refuge
And you will be mine
So
Let me
Be that
Barbed wire
Surrounding
Protecting
And
Keeping you
Mentally
And
Emotionally strong
Don’t worry
All trespasses
Will not enter
So relax
And let go
Leaving all
Your worries
Behind you
When you
Come across
This heavenly
Threshold
Where we
Have built
A strong foundation
I can guarantee
All our past
Sweat and tears
Will hold
It up
In any storm
No weathering
Or
Taking shelter
Anywhere else
We are home

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Karma Will Get You”

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I feel
Every time
I’m around you
I’m dry drowning
In front of you
I can not depend
On you
To save me
If I do
I should
Give up now
Lay down
And let mother nature
End my pain
And
Devour me
It’s just
The realization
I’ve come to
I’ve realized you
Will never
Attempt to come
To my rescue
You’re a liar
Manipulator
A con artist
You lie
About everything
Telling everyone
The sky is gray
When everyone
Sees it’s blue
You have never
Told the truth
To save one life
Including yours
That’s why
You are dead inside
God forbid
If you ever
Said to anyone
I put it on my
Mother
Father
Brother
Sister
Daughter
Son
Life
Everyone would
Fall dead then
No one will
Survive your curse
On them
You would like it
Wouldn’t you
You’re delusional
If you believe
You’ve fooled
The world
Your obsession
With yourself
Is clear as
A sunny day
In June
You want what
You want
At any cost
Not caring
Who gets hurt
In the process
You have
No heart
To give
And
Compassion
Is a curse word
If anyone
Ask for it
From you
You are evil
You get kicks
And thrills
Out of
Tormenting
People
God
Does not like ugly
You will get yours
I don’t have
To do nothing
To you

-Yellowbonewonda

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“I’m Not Following Your Footprints”

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He created me
To be
An original
Someone unique
Marching to
My own beat
So stop
Your
Sanctimonious
Holier
Than thou
Routine
Concentrate
On where
You are going
After your
Life is complete
Your opinion
Of me
Does not
Define me
You do not
Know who I am
What I’ve seen
What I’ve
Been through
Stop being
So quick
To judge
And
Kill
People
Who are different
I am tired
Of you yelling
At the top
Of your lungs
About you
Being Christian
My life
Is not
For you
To judge
But you
Do it anyway
Telling me
My God
Will
Not love me
Because of
What I choose
To be
Or do
In my life
Yet he is
The one
That created me
So why do
You care
Where my soul goes
Heaven or Hell
It is not
Your problem
It is between
Me and my maker
He knows
Me better
Than anyone
That my heart
Is his
And filled
With his love
Pumping
Throughout me
He chooses
To gift me
The ability
To
Walk
Talk
Breath
Everyday
That his blessing
To me
You may not
See it
In his eyes
I’m unique
Special
And what
He created
Me to be
So let me be
Who I am
Suppose to be

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Waiting On Destiny”

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This feeling
I’m feeling
Is foreign
To me
I do not
Feel
Like
Me
It’s a stranger
With my face
In front of me
Staring through the
Mirror
Right
At me
I am
A million miles
Away from
Where I want
To be
In my dreams
In my reality
I’m
No where
But in space
Floating about
Aimlessly
My life is
Not
A Happy one
Not
A Sad one
Either
I’m
Just part
Of
An existence
Not yet
Able to
Reach my
Full potential
And being who
I need to be
My hand is raised
Like
I’m in class
Waiting on
The teacher
To count me
I’m one of those
People
Waiting on
Destiny
I’m in line
For greatness
And I’m not moving
Until I see
The path
I should take
To get me there
The almighty has
Blessed and engrained
Patience inside
Of me
So I will wait
On him
And only him
To guide me
I know it
Will be marvelous
A phenomenon
That all will
Want to see
I will be
His masterpiece
Being what
I should be
And
Not what I want
To be

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Books Unopened”

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This pure love
Comes in a
Tarnished package
Covered in dirt
And grim
To hide among us
Confusing almost everyone
But the ones ready
To see
It’s value
You will
Never understand
Unless you’re open
To why your heart
Is not full
And
Does not beat
Strong
Calm
And
Steadily
It’s because you are
Missing out on
A love
So true
It is
Beyond the physical
It’s something
Of a spiritual connection
That is
Extraordinary
And a privilege
For those
That are willing
To love unconditionally
Taking it as a gift
And handling it
With special care
Like a museum curator
Opening it carefully
In a white room
With white gloves
Avoiding
Contamination
Trying not to
Lose it’s value
These beautiful spirits
Are rare books
In the library
And
Once you’ve read them
They will bring
New life
To everything
It’s up
To you
To continue
From the first page
To the last page
To see 
What lies beneath
The  surface
A marvellous story
Will be told
And will include you
It is a priceless
Experience
So
Wonderful
To know such
An
Amazing
Blessed
Anointed individual
That God wanted
To bless you with
To walk
Hand and hand
Through
Life
For Eternity

-Yellowbonewonda

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“I Can’t Hate No More “

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We have lost
Our dream
Of being
Together forever
This house
Is in a realm
Of purgatory
Unblessed
A prison
With two psychotics
Together
Living on
No food
No water
Only the Devil’s enchantment
Can’t you see
We are
Slowly dying
What was good
Between us
Is history
There are posters
Posted
Stating
We are missing
Our dreams are gone
This marriage
Is a travesty
Our vows
Didn’t include
All this toxicity
The thought of becoming
Mortal enemies
Is reality
Fighting
Arguing
Screaming
Then
Going to bed
Angry
Repeating
It again
And again
We are on
A merry-go-round
Spinning
Ourselves dizzy
But
Today is the day
To find clarity
The beginning
To the end
Of this tyranny
We need
Out of this
Craziness
No more talking
No more
Casting blame
And trying to remember
Who stopped
Loving who
We both did
And stopped
Caring
To build up
Our kingdom
What’s left now
Is instability
Landslide of debris
Let us
Please leave
Before it kills us

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Animal Insincts”

I’m reduced to
Waiting for someone
To feed me my food
Through a closed
Fortified door

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People still feel my frustration
Fearing my aggressiveness
Afraid of my sharp teeth
And razor cut claws
These prison guards know
How much I hunger for freedom
And if they make one slip up
I won’t waste my opportunity
They think I am the lesser of humanity
That my life is not valuable as any other life
On this Earth
I watch as they Kill us
One by one as if it’s for sport
Mounting our heads on their wall
As if it was a fair fight
Using bullets
Tazers and tranquilizer darts
Pretending to be the ultimate predator
But come at me without your weapons
And you will see my aggressive nature
I have been a caged animal
For so long
Captured by man
Taken from my home
Separated from my pride
A magnificent beast
I was
Full of life
No one could compare me
To any other
I turned heads by my shining grace
I was a majestic royal
I made the laws of the lands
Even though it’s confusing
I was feared by everyone
And loved by all
Top of the food chain
Inside my own domain
Now I’m reduced to
People’s amusement
They point and laugh
At my sadness
I’m stuck in this cage
Missing my home
Imprisoned for the rest of my life
I’m disappearing
Diminishing to a mere house pet
I must remember everyday
And not be broken down
I am a fierce predator
That stands in front of you
I have strong bloodlines
Coursing through my veins
Calming my spirit
Encouraging me to imagine
The crisp air back home
Feeding the predator in me
I am not just an animal
And it doesn’t
Give you
The right
To erase my kind
As if we don’t matter
I am a determined
To get back to my family
You will not be
Stuffing or mounting me
Any time in the near future

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Breaking Down”

I have not done it in awhile
But I had a good reason
My body was not prepared
For the new stretches

Muscles have weakened
Stiff and not as limber
As it once was
Only a few years ago

I bent over to
Touch my toes
As I came up
I stopped

Suddenly half way up
I grabbed
Under my breast
Swelling had already set in

As big as my palm
Increasing by the second
Almost covering half my body
Over my ribs

It felt so unnatural
All I could do was
Hold on to dear life
To a chair arms length away
from me

The pain was nothing
I could walk off
My eyes teared up
Someone noticed

Causing panic all around me
People rushing to my rescue
My silence and facial expressions
Said it all

I couldn’t speak
I couldn’t move
I couldn’t breathe
I could only hear the person

Standing next to me
Holding me up
Saying
Take a slow

Deep breath
Breathe breathe
Don’t tense up
It wasn’t working

The attention of everyone staring
Made me more anxious
I was panicking
The surges were hitting me

Worser than the other
Getting rapid and stronger
Coming one after another
Not giving me a chance to catch my breath

Don’t touch me
Don’t move me
Played in my head
Just leave me be

I can get through this
Don’t bother
It was as if something was moving
Under my chest outward

It felt like a ripple effect
As if someone
Had thrown a pebble
Into a body of still water

Causing
A sound so clear
But faint
And if you turned away

Before the pebble hit
You miss the awesomeness
In seeing something so small
Causing water

To move in rapid motion
Creating mini
Circles
Expanding bigger and bigger

Until it disappears
But to me
It was not awesomeness
It was pure torture

So bad I felt like I was having
An out of body experience
Escaping for a moment
Until it was safe

To re-enter
I would not
Wish this pain
On my worst enemy

I hate being this broken
Helpless
And so angry
Because no one knows how to fix me

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-Yellowbonewonda

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“Shadow Games”

I am not satisfied
Not by the food I eat
Not by the career I chose
Not even my purpose in this life

I question myself on a daily
Where am I going
In this lifetime
I have been wondering aimlessly
Far too long

I am hungry for something
That feels so far
Out of my reach
This craving has created sleepless nights
Making me delirious and crazy

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It has me spinning in circles
Chasing my tail
I am so clueless
I do not know what I want

Or what direction to go
I am a dog looking for my bone
Unsure
Where I buried it

It seems I’ve been searching
For what I’ve been missing inside myself
So long it’s becoming an unsolvable mystery
My anxiety has been building up

Feels like a volcano
Ready to erupt
Flowing out Hot lava
Burning everything it touches

This hunger of mine
Is a torturous thing
Never giving me peace
My stomach is always rumbling

As if I am starving
But I skip no meals
I have always cleared my plate
I eat everything

Getting my nourishment
It’s not enough
I have never felt full
A familiar emptiness

That has been with me
Since my first breath
That has grown stronger and stronger
Day after day

I am being pulled
In all directions
I feel I’m coming undone
I am afraid

That what I’m searching and craving for
May never be found
My hunger is leading me blindly
Only to have me chasing shadows

-Yellowbonewonda

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