“Give And Take”

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I can count
Only one time
You had the right
Not to trust me
That was
Before you
Met me
When you did not
Know me
So tell me
Now
What is
Your problem
With me
I have never
Deceived
Harmed
Or
Mistreated you
Ever
All of these years
I have known you
I stood by you
Listened to you
Encouraged you
To live your dreams
I even
Came as backup
Fighting beside you
Helping you
Kill your demons
When they were
Chasing you
Relentlessly
Through your
Nightmares
Into your reality
I thought then
You was no longer
My friend
You was
Family
My love
Was unconditional
My loyalty
Was unbreakable
So I ask again
Why do you not
Trust me
I am always
The only one left
Standing beside you
After everyone else
Has left you
So stop punishing me
For what they did
I do not
Deserve it
I deserve
Nothing less
Than what
I have
Given to you
Respect
Love
Trust
And
A place
In my family

-Yellowbonewonda

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“The Crazy Friend”

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Friends to
The end
A bestie
And definitely
Part of the family
Always borrowing
Your clothes
And eating
You out of
House and home
Being that
One person
In the group
That is bat shit
Crazy
Loud
A pain
In the ass
With every
Screw lose
In their body
Constantly
Talking alot
Of crap
To everybody
The best
Damn friend
To have
Having
Your back
When the
Time comes
For action
Up for anything
And everything
Down to party
Ready to jump
Into a fight
To defend you
With no explanation
Just instincts
And out of
Blind loyalty
It’s a love that
Is unconditional
No DNA needs
To bind them
It’s an
Unbreakable
Connection
Between them
That made
Friends into family

-Yellowbonewonda

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“I Value My Safety”

Why is it
That some people
Include me
In games
I don’t want
To play
Too many people
Putting me
In deadly situations
With riddles
That don’t
Make sense
And no
Plausible answers
To guess
I’m hanging
From
Death traps
I can not
Escape
There are no
Safety nets
To catch me
From sudden death

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I’m a guareenteed
Loser
In this game
When there
Are no
Rules
To keep me safe
I can not
Understand
Why there are
People
Happy at
Putting me
In danger
Because
They believe
My safety is
Not a value
To them
I am not
Put here
To be
Played with
Or
Entertainment
For people
That are
Unhappy
With their
Life

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Island Of Our Own”

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All I ask
Is that you
Promise
Yourself
That you
Will surrender
Your stress
Lock it up
Keeping it
Away from
This happiness
With both
Want to share
The pain you
Had before me
Don’t give
It so
Much control
Just
Direct all
Your senses
And
Concentrate
On us
Let’s stay
In our world
Our own piece
Of heaven
In the center
Of a
Complicated world
No outside
Madness
Will ever
Enter
What
Is outside
Stays outside
Where it can’t
Hurt us
Never
Destroying
What we’ve grown
This kingdom
Is no kingdom
Without this bond
I will always
Be your refuge
And you will be mine
So
Let me
Be that
Barbed wire
Surrounding
Protecting
And
Keeping you
Mentally
And
Emotionally strong
Don’t worry
All trespasses
Will not enter
So relax
And let go
Leaving all
Your worries
Behind you
When you
Come across
This heavenly
Threshold
Where we
Have built
A strong foundation
I can guarantee
All our past
Sweat and tears
Will hold
It up
In any storm
No weathering
Or
Taking shelter
Anywhere else
We are home

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Laid In Front Of You”

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Two glasses
On a table
Rotated to
Your point
Of view
It does not
Matter
Everyone else
Sees it as
Wrong
But you
Say it
Ain’t so
Your reasoning
Is warped
You will never
See
The truth
Even if
It was
Presented right
In front
Of you
My conclusion
Is I’m damned
In whatever
I do
I will never
Have the chance
To be
A part of
Your life
I’m forever
At arms length
Doubted
With no
Reason
To back it up
I’m feeling
Some type of way
Because you lied
You put me
In this position
Making me
Feel like
I’m the one
That is wrong
And blind
To the truth
I shouldn’t have
To defend myself
When I’ve
Committed no crime
Against you
You are the one
That let your
Past and enemies
Condemn me
Someone else
Made the decision
To hurt you
That was them
Not me
I’ve been here
Standing steadfast
Beside you
Never faltering
Real and confident
In every step
I made with you
I laid everything
About me
Out on the table
You should
Know me
My heart
My story
And my character
Nothing has
Ever changed
I’ve been the same
Person
I hate how
You say
You want
Someone real
But keep
Doing stupid
Things to offend me
Stop taking it
Out on me
I’ve never
Turned my back
Once on you
I was the one
That told you
You was family
And
Embraced you

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Inexcusable Behaviour”

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I’ve recorded
And analyzed
Everything
Mentally
Never
Forgetting
The lies
That left
Your mouth
So easily
I won’t
Forget
That you lied
Straight to
My face
I remembered it
As if it
Was yesterday
So vividly
I can still
Taste
The hate
That spued from
Your mouth
You lacked
Self-respect
And all dignity
Your
Actions
Spoke
With fluidity
While slug
And sewage
Poured
Slowly
From all your
Crevices
Stinking up
The air
There was
No way
To breath
Around your
Poisonous
Toxicity
The habits
You’ve developed
From your past
Is hindering you
And
You’ve formed a
Very distinctive
Pelicular feature
That shields you
You are unable
To respect
Those good
To you
But today
My truth
Will be
Smacking you
I was born
With the capability
Of seeing
Truth
And
Bull shit
Around me
I treat
Your words as
Little Particles
Floating
In the air
About to plague
My environment
With a
Virus
With no cure
For me

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Not In Line For You”

You said
You would
Need me
Want me
And
Love me
And only me
For life
But it wasn’t
The truth
Your sidechick
I guess
Had enough
Of you
Telling her
You would
Leave me
Divorce me
And make
Her your
New wife
You had
No intentions
In leaving
Her
Nor I
And that became
Your biggest mistake
You put
Your trust
In a scorned
Woman
With secrets
You kept
From me
And she got
Tired of
Your many excuses
She did
What she felt
Would make
Her happy
With one click
Destroying us
Sending
All the
Proof of
Your explicit
Relationship
Letters
Videos
Chats
In black
White
And color
Your cheating
Has costed
Us everything
It was
An ultimate kill
Killing us
Quickly

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I will not
Be the other woman
Waiting in line
For you
I gave you
All of me
You threw
It away
For a romp in
The hay
With someone
Otherthan me
Imploding
Everything
That mattered
Between us
There is
No way
To fixing
This mess
You created
Call her up
I know
She’s waiting for you

-Yellowbonewonda

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“My Enemy Of My Enemy”

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You live
With them
Everyday
Going to
Family events
Birthdays
Funerals
And
Holidays
You shouldn’t
Have to
Be afraid
Of what
They will
Do behind
Your back
But you are
You can’t
Trust them
As far as
You can throw
Them
It’s that
Heartbreaking
Saying
Who needs
Enemies
When you have
Family
No stranger can
Do worst
Than them
Than people
Closer to you
They know
You better
Than anyone
They are family
Your secrets
Are their ammunition
And they use
Them
Like bullets
Hitting you
In rapid
Fire sessions
Center mass
Shredding your heart
Into pieces
Guaranteeing no
Chance of rescuitation
All that’s
Needed to
Be done
Is to
Pronounce you
DOA
At the scene

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Karma Will Get You”

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I feel
Every time
I’m around you
I’m dry drowning
In front of you
I can not depend
On you
To save me
If I do
I should
Give up now
Lay down
And let mother nature
End my pain
And
Devour me
It’s just
The realization
I’ve come to
I’ve realized you
Will never
Attempt to come
To my rescue
You’re a liar
Manipulator
A con artist
You lie
About everything
Telling everyone
The sky is gray
When everyone
Sees it’s blue
You have never
Told the truth
To save one life
Including yours
That’s why
You are dead inside
God forbid
If you ever
Said to anyone
I put it on my
Mother
Father
Brother
Sister
Daughter
Son
Life
Everyone would
Fall dead then
No one will
Survive your curse
On them
You would like it
Wouldn’t you
You’re delusional
If you believe
You’ve fooled
The world
Your obsession
With yourself
Is clear as
A sunny day
In June
You want what
You want
At any cost
Not caring
Who gets hurt
In the process
You have
No heart
To give
And
Compassion
Is a curse word
If anyone
Ask for it
From you
You are evil
You get kicks
And thrills
Out of
Tormenting
People
God
Does not like ugly
You will get yours
I don’t have
To do nothing
To you

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Grow Up Or Leave”

I’m not
That other
Woman that
You had
Last
In your bed
I can not
Be
In a relationship
With a man child
I’m grown
Looking for
A grown up
Relationship
I’m only
Accepting
To live
My life
With man
I don’t want
To have to
Break it down
Every time
We talk
As if you’re
My child
Your mother
Raised you
I should be
Reaping the benefits
Of her
Hard work
Giving you
Values
Morals
And
Common sense
Yet I’m talking
Slow and carefully
Pronouncing each word
Almost sounding
Them out
So you don’t
Get lost
Sit back
Listen to
A grown person
Speak
Learn
Something
20171109_224017
Before you
Bounce
A check
You can not cash
You are too
Busy trying
To over talk
Me
But you haven’t
Heard a word
I said
You’re in over
Your head
Too stubborn
Full of yourself
You are not seeing
Past your
Pride
Your ego is bruised
You are
Quick to fight
Ready for action
No talking
Or listening
To my side
You would rather
Have things
Get out of hand
Being a type of
Man
That will
Lose everything
Quicker than
A blink
Because you’re not
Noticing
I’m one step
From throwing
In the towel
Leaving
And not returning
Again
Don’t punish me
Because
You don’t like
My answers
I gave
To questions
That don’t
Make sense
You haven’t
Proved your case
In the least
I haven’t lied
I won’t
Admit to anything
Not the truth
Either believe me
Or leave me
I will not satisfy
Your rants
Grow up and
Stop acting
Like an a$$

-Yellowbonewonda

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“I’m Not Following Your Footprints”

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He created me
To be
An original
Someone unique
Marching to
My own beat
So stop
Your
Sanctimonious
Holier
Than thou
Routine
Concentrate
On where
You are going
After your
Life is complete
Your opinion
Of me
Does not
Define me
You do not
Know who I am
What I’ve seen
What I’ve
Been through
Stop being
So quick
To judge
And
Kill
People
Who are different
I am tired
Of you yelling
At the top
Of your lungs
About you
Being Christian
My life
Is not
For you
To judge
But you
Do it anyway
Telling me
My God
Will
Not love me
Because of
What I choose
To be
Or do
In my life
Yet he is
The one
That created me
So why do
You care
Where my soul goes
Heaven or Hell
It is not
Your problem
It is between
Me and my maker
He knows
Me better
Than anyone
That my heart
Is his
And filled
With his love
Pumping
Throughout me
He chooses
To gift me
The ability
To
Walk
Talk
Breath
Everyday
That his blessing
To me
You may not
See it
In his eyes
I’m unique
Special
And what
He created
Me to be
So let me be
Who I am
Suppose to be

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Waiting On Destiny”

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This feeling
I’m feeling
Is foreign
To me
I do not
Feel
Like
Me
It’s a stranger
With my face
In front of me
Staring through the
Mirror
Right
At me
I am
A million miles
Away from
Where I want
To be
In my dreams
In my reality
I’m
No where
But in space
Floating about
Aimlessly
My life is
Not
A Happy one
Not
A Sad one
Either
I’m
Just part
Of
An existence
Not yet
Able to
Reach my
Full potential
And being who
I need to be
My hand is raised
Like
I’m in class
Waiting on
The teacher
To count me
I’m one of those
People
Waiting on
Destiny
I’m in line
For greatness
And I’m not moving
Until I see
The path
I should take
To get me there
The almighty has
Blessed and engrained
Patience inside
Of me
So I will wait
On him
And only him
To guide me
I know it
Will be marvelous
A phenomenon
That all will
Want to see
I will be
His masterpiece
Being what
I should be
And
Not what I want
To be

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Only Truth Be Told”

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With me
Or against me
Take heed
To my warning
A lie is
A deal breaker
In any type
Of relationship
With me
It is not
Me
You are saving
With your lies
But yourself
Be truthful
To avoid a decision
That is mine
To make
I am not afraid to
Live without you
In my life
I will have
No regrets
Do not
Come to me
Without
Your truth
Come quickly
With your answers
When I ask questions
That matter to me
Say it
Without thinking
Too much
To save face
Your lies
Will never
Give me comfort
So do not
Make it
Your only excuse
To avoid
The disappointment
Upon my face
There is a greater
Price to pay
For every lie
You kill
What was ever good
Between us
And replacing it
With empty space
Dividing us
So much
We will never
Be able to
Find our way back
To each other’s
Embrace
You can not have
It both ways
Either you
Live alone
In a house
Full of lies
Or
With me
In Truth
It’s only one world
I can live in
And I know
You know
Which place
Do not put it
On me
When you let
Your cowardness
Help
Lead you into
Pushing my hand
And choosing
To leave
After I find out
What you
Could not
Say
To my face

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Books Unopened”

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This pure love
Comes in a
Tarnished package
Covered in dirt
And grim
To hide among us
Confusing almost everyone
But the ones ready
To see
It’s value
You will
Never understand
Unless you’re open
To why your heart
Is not full
And
Does not beat
Strong
Calm
And
Steadily
It’s because you are
Missing out on
A love
So true
It is
Beyond the physical
It’s something
Of a spiritual connection
That is
Extraordinary
And a privilege
For those
That are willing
To love unconditionally
Taking it as a gift
And handling it
With special care
Like a museum curator
Opening it carefully
In a white room
With white gloves
Avoiding
Contamination
Trying not to
Lose it’s value
These beautiful spirits
Are rare books
In the library
And
Once you’ve read them
They will bring
New life
To everything
It’s up
To you
To continue
From the first page
To the last page
To see 
What lies beneath
The  surface
A marvellous story
Will be told
And will include you
It is a priceless
Experience
So
Wonderful
To know such
An
Amazing
Blessed
Anointed individual
That God wanted
To bless you with
To walk
Hand and hand
Through
Life
For Eternity

-Yellowbonewonda

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“An Urgence”

20171023_224627
I ask you
Girl in the mirror
I already know
You are phenomenal
A queen underneath
All this rawness
A talented
And
Creative
That needs her moment
To break out
And show
Her greatness
I don’t understand
Why I can’t talk
To you
I know you’re there
I catch glimpses
Of you
Everyday
In the mirror
I feel your power
Your beauty
Your presence
It is something
To be reckoned with
It’s an amazing glory
Yet I pretend
As if you are a stranger
I am afraid
You will not like me
And accept me
For who I am
Yes I am your
Secret admirer
I’ve been
Wishing
And hoping
To be like you
Studying your every move
I swear
I’m not stalking
No one
Your essence
Surrounds me
I’m in awe of
Your magnificence
A goddess
On Earth
In front of me
Beside me
All around me
But I see those
Shattered
And
Missing pieces
But once I’m together
My greatness will be
An unstoppable power
Yet my fear
Prevents me
From knowing
How to approach you
I feeling guilty
And ashamed
That I haven’t
Ask you
The important things
That has been in my heart
Needing answers
I need to know
These
Things that
Will set me free
What makes you
You
What are you thinking
Where are you going
What is the future
For me
And
Am I worthy

-Yellowbonewonda

“All Rights Reserved: The copyright holder retains all the rights provided by copyright law, such as distribution, performance, and creation of their work.

“In Your Feelings”

By: Yellowbonewonda

Just because
I don’t answer
When you call
Or talk to you
On a regular
Does not mean
I’m ignoring you
$hit rises
And falls
Without warning
Life happens
And human factors
Become unexpected parts
Of the damn equation
Assumptions
Will get you
Blacklisted
Your choices
Will be
To be burned
Recycled
Or buried somewhere
In the middle
Of nowhere
Don’t have
Conversations
In your head
And conclude
Before asking
Wait to see
If there is
A good reason
Check your attitude
Before you get
Your @ss handed to you
It’s not necessary
To become
A code 187
Murdering your chances
Because you didn’t
Come correct
Because of your
Biased conversations
Between
You
Yourself
And your @sshole
They are all wrong
In their three way
Conviction
Without a trial
To hear evidence
That opposed them
Get out of your feelings
You’re not the center
Of anyone’s universe
So take caution
Before approaching
Any situation
Nothing is
As it seems
What’s happening
In this world
Could be serious
And you are
In some unwarranted
Emotions
Choosing the wrong way
And now there is
A declaration
Of war
And you are
Being killed off
With no compassion
Empthy
Or sympathy
Because of your
Blind approach
On your decisions
To being froggy
Leaping before looking
Then crashing and burning
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“Food For Thought”

20170927_111007
Why do you rush
Here and there
Take your time
Enjoy the scenery
You only have
One life to live
Stop chasing behind
Faces on paper
There are other
Things in life
That are important
Stop neglecting
Your happiness
And the simple things in life
Like family and friends
They are the ones that
Love you unconditionally
They provide you
The freedom to be who
You want to be
Without being caught
In censorship
Satisfy those
Cravings before
It starts crying like a baby
Refusing to be ignored
Making you
Tired
Exhausted
And incoherent
Causing you to fall
Into a trap
Of grabbing
Everything
That captivates you
Then
It’s too late
You’re overeating
And overburdened
Your eyes are big
Magnifying your hunger
Your stomach is suffering
To the point of
Exploding
Take my advice
Eat slowly
Chew each morsel
Taste your food
As if it was
The first time
Savour it
Record the data
Imprint it permanently
On your DNA
Making it apart of you
Sense there is
More
To your life
Other than despondency

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Animal Insincts”

I’m reduced to
Waiting for someone
To feed me my food
Through a closed
Fortified door

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People still feel my frustration
Fearing my aggressiveness
Afraid of my sharp teeth
And razor cut claws
These prison guards know
How much I hunger for freedom
And if they make one slip up
I won’t waste my opportunity
They think I am the lesser of humanity
That my life is not valuable as any other life
On this Earth
I watch as they Kill us
One by one as if it’s for sport
Mounting our heads on their wall
As if it was a fair fight
Using bullets
Tazers and tranquilizer darts
Pretending to be the ultimate predator
But come at me without your weapons
And you will see my aggressive nature
I have been a caged animal
For so long
Captured by man
Taken from my home
Separated from my pride
A magnificent beast
I was
Full of life
No one could compare me
To any other
I turned heads by my shining grace
I was a majestic royal
I made the laws of the lands
Even though it’s confusing
I was feared by everyone
And loved by all
Top of the food chain
Inside my own domain
Now I’m reduced to
People’s amusement
They point and laugh
At my sadness
I’m stuck in this cage
Missing my home
Imprisoned for the rest of my life
I’m disappearing
Diminishing to a mere house pet
I must remember everyday
And not be broken down
I am a fierce predator
That stands in front of you
I have strong bloodlines
Coursing through my veins
Calming my spirit
Encouraging me to imagine
The crisp air back home
Feeding the predator in me
I am not just an animal
And it doesn’t
Give you
The right
To erase my kind
As if we don’t matter
I am a determined
To get back to my family
You will not be
Stuffing or mounting me
Any time in the near future

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Breaking Down”

I have not done it in awhile
But I had a good reason
My body was not prepared
For the new stretches

Muscles have weakened
Stiff and not as limber
As it once was
Only a few years ago

I bent over to
Touch my toes
As I came up
I stopped

Suddenly half way up
I grabbed
Under my breast
Swelling had already set in

As big as my palm
Increasing by the second
Almost covering half my body
Over my ribs

It felt so unnatural
All I could do was
Hold on to dear life
To a chair arms length away
from me

The pain was nothing
I could walk off
My eyes teared up
Someone noticed

Causing panic all around me
People rushing to my rescue
My silence and facial expressions
Said it all

I couldn’t speak
I couldn’t move
I couldn’t breathe
I could only hear the person

Standing next to me
Holding me up
Saying
Take a slow

Deep breath
Breathe breathe
Don’t tense up
It wasn’t working

The attention of everyone staring
Made me more anxious
I was panicking
The surges were hitting me

Worser than the other
Getting rapid and stronger
Coming one after another
Not giving me a chance to catch my breath

Don’t touch me
Don’t move me
Played in my head
Just leave me be

I can get through this
Don’t bother
It was as if something was moving
Under my chest outward

It felt like a ripple effect
As if someone
Had thrown a pebble
Into a body of still water

Causing
A sound so clear
But faint
And if you turned away

Before the pebble hit
You miss the awesomeness
In seeing something so small
Causing water

To move in rapid motion
Creating mini
Circles
Expanding bigger and bigger

Until it disappears
But to me
It was not awesomeness
It was pure torture

So bad I felt like I was having
An out of body experience
Escaping for a moment
Until it was safe

To re-enter
I would not
Wish this pain
On my worst enemy

I hate being this broken
Helpless
And so angry
Because no one knows how to fix me

20170802_201056

-Yellowbonewonda

“All Rights Reserved: The copyright holder retains all the rights provided by copyright law, such as distribution, performance, and creation of their work.”

“Shadow Games”

I am not satisfied
Not by the food I eat
Not by the career I chose
Not even my purpose in this life

I question myself on a daily
Where am I going
In this lifetime
I have been wondering aimlessly
Far too long

I am hungry for something
That feels so far
Out of my reach
This craving has created sleepless nights
Making me delirious and crazy

20170728_222758

It has me spinning in circles
Chasing my tail
I am so clueless
I do not know what I want

Or what direction to go
I am a dog looking for my bone
Unsure
Where I buried it

It seems I’ve been searching
For what I’ve been missing inside myself
So long it’s becoming an unsolvable mystery
My anxiety has been building up

Feels like a volcano
Ready to erupt
Flowing out Hot lava
Burning everything it touches

This hunger of mine
Is a torturous thing
Never giving me peace
My stomach is always rumbling

As if I am starving
But I skip no meals
I have always cleared my plate
I eat everything

Getting my nourishment
It’s not enough
I have never felt full
A familiar emptiness

That has been with me
Since my first breath
That has grown stronger and stronger
Day after day

I am being pulled
In all directions
I feel I’m coming undone
I am afraid

That what I’m searching and craving for
May never be found
My hunger is leading me blindly
Only to have me chasing shadows

-Yellowbonewonda

“All Rights Reserved: The copyright holder retains all the rights provided by copyright law, such as distribution, performance, and creation of their work.”