“End Of Daylight”

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It should be a cutoff
At a certain age
That children
Stop being told
Sugarcoated lies about life
Like when the sun comes up
That nightmares
No longer exist
As if monsters
Take a break
And
Are bounded to
Stay under their beds
In their closet
Or
Disappear into the darkness
Because
They do not
Nightmares
And
Dreams
Both come for you
Eyes open
Eyes closed
It does not matter
You are either
Going to be chased
Or
Chase after them
That is life
And
Some children need
To be prepared for that reality
That neither
Dreams
Nor
Nightmares
Rest
Or
Sleep
They keep coming
As long as your imagination works
Your ambitions are big
You have a shinning disposition
That someone wants
To put out
It is up to you to figure out
If you will
Go with fear
Or
Go with strength
And
They need to be told
No one but them can win
Their fight

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Conflicting Feelings”

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It is between
A Rock
And
Hard place
Type of feeling
Where most stand
Tugging back and forth
With a gripping predicament
When making hard decisions
On whether or not
Being the bigger person
Is right
Or
Protecting yourself
Is better
Either way
Being an adult
It is confusing
Because as children
These decisions
Where made
By shaking hands
Hugging
Saying sorry
And
Going back to playing
But
As adults
We all
Live in our feelings
Bottling up
Unleashed aggression
Awaiting for the right occasion
To start ticking
Until explosion
Blasting everyone
Into oblivion
Leaving no one standing
Exposing every buried secret
Into the air everyone
Is breathing

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Approach With Respect”

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Do not
Stand looking
Lost
Or
Clueless
If simple words
Soar above your head
Say so
I am patient
I do not mind
Drawing pictures
For you to understand
The words being spoken
Because
The right hemisphere
And
The left hemisphere
Of my brain
Are both strong
Are both working
Logic
And
Creativity
Over here
Are a blended family
In a sense I am like
The military
I will never leave any man behind
If they need it
Broken down to them
Knowledge is power
Intelligence is sexy
And
Having an inflated ego
Is damning
And
Will send you packing
Only to look foolish
After approaching
A lady you said was a bitch
But she was not
She only respected
Herself
And
Did not tolerate your foolishness
Remember
Hey baby girl
Is not on her birth certificate
Asking her name
Is the first sign
Of maturity
And
Will give you a sense
Of who you are speaking with
Quality
Over
Quantity
If you are looking for it
It can possibly
Alleviate alot of
Unnecessary craziness

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Enough Strength To Make Contact”

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Eventhough the exit
Is in my sight
It is too far to get to
Through the dark
So I am left
Waiting
Pondering
At the edge of darkness
With a small lit candle
That is about to go out
Not able to go forward
Not able to go backwards
Because every demon is
Surrounding me
Ready
Eager to attack
Once the light goes out
I ask
What do I do
When all directions
Are covered
Where do I run
When there
Is no place to hide
How do I fight
Something I can not see
Once the light goes out
I need a better plan
Than swinging aimlessly
In the dark
Because
It will be very taxing
And
Too tiresome
To not make the necessary
Fist to face contact
So I can live
Beyond the last twinkle
Of light

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Clapping And Cheers”

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I do not intend
On being remembered
As just another human stain
Someone who fell down
Never to get up
Doing what was expected
Being another person
That stopped giving a damn
Laying down
Being ignorantly blind
Going along with someone else’s plan
So when I am gone
I have to be remembered
As more than
A name on a headstone
I want my life
To be rated as
An Academy Award movie
Everyone loved
With no critics
Being cruel
Ruthless
Inhuman towards
The final showing
After it is done
Saying
My life was a flop
My words were fluff
Booing me out town
While giving me the
Two thumbs down
I am striving for the gold
I want that standing ovation
The cheering
The tears of joy
And
Them
Asking for another encore
As the curtains come down

-Yellowbonewonda

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“They Will Smile In Your Face”

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When shady people
Are self destructing
They are willing to destroy
Everyone
Even the kindest of hearts
That helped them
In their darkest of times
When they had nothing
They do not care
Who it is
Just what they can get
From them
And
When they
Say trust me
Be suspiciously skeptical
Because they are hiding something
Very dangerous
Harmful to any kindness
Coming towards them
Who you let in
Who you talk to
Who you trust
Can kill you
Imprison you
Or
Hurt you
And
If you do not believe me
Know it is your funeral
Because you failed
To heed my warning
To watch your heart
To watch your pocketbook
And
Protect your freedom
Of being implicated in anything
That has to do with them
Trusting everyone
Can be a downfall
Keep small circles
With people of quality

-Yellowbonewonda

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“What Fills Your Heart”

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It is up to you
How you deal with people
Of whom
You think are hopeless
But think
If you was lost
Falling
Or
Walking in circles
And
Angry at everything
What would you want someone
To do for you
Would you want them
To help you find your way back
Or
Would you think
There is nothing
Within you left to save
And
Just leave you alone
To wallow in your pain
See
What this madness does
It creeps in the darkness
Latching onto the unexpected
Holding on like a dozen leeches
Siphoning off heavy hearts
The love that is left
Replacing that shell of a person
With nothing but
Vengeance
And
Hate
Leaving it
With no other purpose
Otherthan
Causing pain
Destruction
Confusion
To those in their path
Because
What hurt them
Is still hurting them
And
They want to share
The pain they feel
Instead of letting it go
To feel what can heal
That one
Someone that will share
A love that will remove
All their pain

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Familiar Road Always Taken”

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You see the mess you in
But
You still stick with it
The same horrible job
The same messed up people
The same mental trauma
The same family dysfunction
A familiarity
That keeps you walking
In the same circle
Only to
Kill time
Waste opportunities
To change the ending
Into a better future
Worth having
It is a shame
This happens
To some people
They get trapped
In a loop
And
Refuse to move forward
Continuing to live a life
In the familiar
Where a spouse
Steadily cheats
Do not work
Give no support
Leeches off you
And
You stay with them
Where a job
With no growth
With no hope
Less pay
Full of discrimination
And
You stay with it
You walk the same steps
That never go anywhere
Never taking chances
Because you are afraid of
What maybe in the future
But not realizing
Anything is better than your present
If it means you can be happy
Why not take a chance
Step forward

-Yellowbonewonda

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“How Dangerous Depends On Human Intent”

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Mortal demons
In human form
Inflated egos
Waiting to do you harm
Evil surrounds us
On a daily
Calling your phone
Knocking on your door
Sending you cryptic messages
To try to scare you
To try to deceive you
To try to make a victim
Out of you
For their entertainment
For their enjoyment
But I refuse
To allow them in
I am protecting myself
As best as I know how
Do not disturb
On the phone
Only my contacts listed
Are able to talk to me
Every door locked
And are secure
At home
My car
Wherever I am
The alarm system is always set
I do not talk freely to strangers
No personal information given
No new friends
For a moment
The threat level is high
Until the coast is clear
And
People change back
To being more human
Compassionate
Helpful
Loving
Towards their fellow man
And
Fellow woman
And
When no one is shot
Just minding their own business
Then I will do another
Threat accessment
To see if
I can lower the level
To moderate
Or
None at all
Until then it stays
Where it is
High
Trust no one

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Started With Nine Lives”

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I am
Owning to the fact
I must be the luckiest person
To still be living
After you shot me
In the back
I think I must have
Seven out of nine lives left
I give it to you
You got me
This time
But next time
I will be ready
To shoot first
It is sad
I should have known after
Observations
Conversations
Past experiences
Never to turn my back
On no one
Including a friend
Since
People are temperamental
And
No one can read minds
Or
Know where another person’s
Mind is at
I hate it is
Not until the opportunity presents
Them or you
If they will sale you down the river
Or
Push you under a bus
To save themself
But of course
I am telling you this now
Because of my mistake
I got comfortable
Compliacent
Trusting
And
I failed to protect myself
I had a lapse in judgment
I let my guard down
For a millisecond
Now I’m bleeding
From my back
I did not realize
The reality of the situation
Until the initial shock wore off
Three out of six shots hit me
But
It was not until
I saw
The lack of concern
On your face
That another life
Slipped away
Leaving me with six lives
To get you back
It hurts that
My love
My truth
Their lies
Or
Their lying by omission
Costed me too much

-Yellowbonewonda

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“This Life Or The Next”

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Have you ever felt
Out of place
Like you was supposed to be
Born in some other time
Have you ever traveled to a place
Where you have never been before
Yet it feels so familiar
As if you had just come home
Well
I have felt it many times
And
The strongest connection
That came to me
Was when I traveled to Rome
Something took over my body
I felt like I really belonged
I walked the streets
With excitement
With pride
But
It was not until
I stood in the colosseum
That my whole body froze
My feet felt like roots
Digging themselves into
The ground
And
A rush of memories came over me
Flooding my mind
As if I lived in that era
And
It was all
Triggered by
All the small bread crumbs
I left behind
To encourage my travels
To this distant land
So it could show
This existance of me
That I had unfinished business
Still waiting to be finished
And
Until I finish it
I will be sentenced to continuing
Into the next existance
Until I get it done
I just
Wonder how many lifetimes
I have to waste
To learn what I am
Destined to be
In this world

-Yellowbonewonda

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“I Got Nothing Left To Give”

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A little advice
In handling your next girl
You need to learn
To let go of
All the hate
Inside you
And
Everything you know
About dysfunctional love
Because
This pattern of pain
You accustomed to
And
Love to dish out
It is not for me
Because
If I am your queen
I should not have to say it
I should be put there
Above the rest
Right by your side
And
Nothing less
But
Instead
You must think
I am your victim
Sorry love
You are wrong
With all the sheningnans
You have done
You have made me numb
And
Of course
If you still think you can hurt me
That is false too
The damage has been done
Granted
I have forgiven you in the past
Way too many
Yes I did
But
Unlike you
I was in love
Wait wait
Did you catch that
When I said I was in love
Okay
Let us continue
I am awake now
And
To continue
Allowing you to keep coming back
Again
And
Again
And
Again
I am looking for corporal punishment
Without even committing a crime
Sorry love
I like my freedom
Good luck with the next one

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Dear Friend”

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I know we have not
Spoke in awhile
Because
I have been thinking
How could I approach
This subject of
How I feel towards you
I guess I will
Just come out with it
You may not have been
My best friend
But
We were friends
At least I thought
See
I heard a heartbreaking story
Some time ago
That you broke girl code
And
You still had the nerve
To smile in my face
Call my phone
And
Try to talk to me
As if you had done
Nothing to me
I just hope you enjoyed him
Yes girl
He told me
The torrid excruciating
Details of your hookup
And
The side job
You have been hiding
From everybody
At first I thought
He was playing with me
But
Then I spent time
Thinking it over
He had nothing to gain
By telling me
And
It made sense
To me
Neither of you
Deserved me
It is over
And
As long as you leave me alone
I will bury what he told me
But if you call me again
I will crush your world
By telling that part of your life
You have been hiding
Just know
I do not want to be
Not even an associate to you
Forget you ever knew me
Because honey
I do not do love triangles

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Breakup Makeover”

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Hello
How are you doing
Are you missing me
Still
Or
Are you over me
Yes
It has been a long time
Since we saw each other
But I promised you
If I went through with it
I would call you
And
Today was the day
When I got rid of all of it
It is all gone
I finally did it
I cut it all off
The dead weight
That was holding me hostage
And
Stopped me from moving forward
And
Boy
Did I really go for it
I went with a Halle Berry cut
And
It is very freeing
Nothing down my back
On my shoulders
Near my ears
I can feel the cool breeze
Blowing
And
You probably would not recognize me
Now
Because
I am happy
Without you

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Out The Rain A Beast Comes”

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When I hear
The rain coming down
Falling so steadily
I think of all the tears
From the broken hearted
Being released
From all their hurt
From all their pain
From all their confusion
Just
Everything that weighs
Their body down so heavily
Hitting the ground
Going down the drains
Liberating them
Giving them such clarity
That tomorrow is a new day
To start off mending
And
Finding their happiness
Within them
Because no one should ever
Have so much control
That they can break you
I say if you listening
Put on your big girl panties
Gather up your strength
Get back to being yourself
That unstoppable hungry beast
Who attacked life everyday
With a vengeance
And
Get back what was lost
Your happiness
Your personality
Your dignity

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Professionals Are Hard To Catch”

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He used a
Charming demeanor
Direct eye contact
Steady stance
To deceive everybody
He lied even when
It was not necessary
It was his superpower
It gave him strength
It gave him confidence
That he could pull
The wool over everybody
No one could catch him in a lie
Even his mama
She lost her touch
Long ago
After pubescence
Opened his nose
To smell the scent of a woman
It was then
He spoke his first lie
So he could get lucky
And
Thereafter
It was his mission
To sharpen his skill
In order to be a professional
With no tell tell signs
To discredit him
or
A conscious
To hinder him
From ever
Getting what he wanted

-Yellowbonewonda

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“You Determine What Is Earned”

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We are taught as children
To give everyone respect
Freely
Just shut your mouth
And
Respect everyone
But I had to adjust
Those teachings
Over the years
Because it is definitely flawed
I know through my experiences
Respect is not a given
Respect should be earned
Granted
I am not a raging fool
Hating
Because I hate no one
I give
A clean slate to everyone
And
Each person
Determines
How much I give
How much I do not give
It is about
Nothing more
Nothing less
It is only
What is earned
And
If you have not earning any
Then guess what
That is what you get
Zilch
Nix
Zip
Nada
Diddly-squat
Zero
The end
No more interaction needed

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Images Engraved On The Heart”

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Everyday
He eagerly waits
To return to me
Rushing home
After a long day
He has spent away from me
And
Believe me
I am hoping that
It feels like an eternity
Because when he sees me
I want him to devour me
Entirely
See
It is exciting
When a man is your lover
It is exciting
When he is your best friend too
But nothing matches the most
Excitement yet
To know he pays attention
To you too
By making it his everyday mission
To create beautiful moments
That is beyond lusting after you
And
Just enjoying
And
Using all of his senses
Including
The most vital organs
His heart
To take mental images
Of every moment
Every laugh
Every cry
Every loving embrace
Every hair that oddly fell out of place
Remembering
What first connected us
And
What will keep us together
Even when we are apart
For just a little bit

-Yellowbonewonda

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“He Had Errors In Coding”

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My first mistake was
Talking to him
My second mistake was
Trusting him
My third mistake was
When I gave my heart to him
And
It should have been
The last mistake given
But dumb me
I kept telling myself
I loved him
And
Love would get us through
Anything
Until he lied to me
Deceieved me
Broke my heart into pieces
And
Caused my emotions to explode
Going nuclear
I just feel I have lost control
Reeling uncontrollably
Questioning every decision
How could he
Wait until I was invested
To finally introduce me
To the real HIM
Hiding behind the mask
The one
Who switch baited me
And
I have to admit
I am
In complete denial
I can not believe he fool me
He got me to lower my guard
Open my life
To his madness
Forcing me to
Second guess everything
I can not believe
Any of this
He played with my heart
Strung me along
Then crushed me under his boot

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Defenses Weakening Daily”

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Sadly
I am not a loser
Not once
Not twice
But thrice
Because
As of late
These days that have been
Coming towards me
They have been winning over me
I keep rolling a crap shoot
Of a game
Everytime I touch the dice
I get snake eyes
I ask you
How can you get sick
From going no where
I have not been outside
In ages
Yet the weather changes
From cold
To heat
To raining up a storm
In minutes
And
My body feels it
Waking my arch nemises
That lives inside of me
So he can play a vicious game
Called break me into pieces
Which weakens my defenses
So much
That I catch every aching pain
And sickness
What is this mess
I should be at my strongest
Being tucked in my bed
Hidden
From all the terrifying monsters

-Yellowbonewonda

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“I Could Not Be You”

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Everyday I wake
I am surprised
How much I care
How much I love
How strong my heart beats
Even after the
Many injuries to it
Ranging from
Minor bruises
Small lesions
Gapping wounds
Still bleeding extremely
And
This thing that
Continues to keep love alive
Inside of me
I must confess
I do not know where
It come from
It is something bigger than me
Supplying me
My only plea
I do wish for
Is a minor adjustment
In order to keep
A proper gauge of my sanity
Believe me
Do not get me wrong
I am ecstatic to not be like you
Cold
Heartless
Empty
Incapable of love
But
I just need more balance
A little of you
Inside of me
So as to protect myself
More from the heartache
That sometimes consumes me
Because
At times
I do not understand
Why
I am not dead from
The enormous grief
Or
The excruciating pain
Caused by my gigantic heart
That at times
Is worn on my sleeve
Often too much
Crippling me
Sometimes for days
At a time
Because each time
The recovery is harder
Than the last
To bounce from
To getting me back
To being me

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Some Dreams Materialize Slowly”

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I never believed
In fairytales until I witnessed
One become a reality
It was magical
It just
Jumped off the pages
Right out of a book
Read to me as a little girl
It was everything
It was encouraging
And
It is slowly convincing
Me
A simple everyday girl
That I can have everything
Including a prince
With a kid or two
Just thinking about it
Gives me goosebumps
That someone is out there
Waiting
Hoping
Searching for me
Wanting me
To cross his path
So he can
Sweep me off my feet
Into whirlwind
Love affair
Made for soulmates
And
Although
I am trying to be patient
I am tired of the bull $hit
Because
That damn
Burger king commercial
Is taunting me
The chanting in my head
I want it
Now
My way
Not helping
My anxiousness
Is at the red line
So I am thinking
I am in need of a vacation
Take myself out the everyday
Thing
That is my life
So I can decompress
Release all this weight
From me
So I can be ready for him
To see my heart
In all its glory

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Mentally Caged In”

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Not until racism
Is put to rest
Not until human trafficking
No longer exist
Not until hate
Is eradicated from every heart
And
Equality is for all
Black
White
Gay
Straight
Man
Woman
Religious
Non religious
Only then
Thereafter we can say
We are all free
Otherwise
No matter how far we have come
The illusion of freedom
Is what it is
And
The days of human slavery
Is still real
Of course
It is not like the old days
Bowing to a master
Saying yes sir
Getting whipped across the back
To be conditioned
But what it is
Is the people
Trapped in their own head
Thinking as a inferior
Or
Thinking as a superior
Something some people are still taught
As children to be
When they grow up
And
In order to erase
All of this
People need to take the initiative
To break the cycle
By getting educated on different cultures
By being patient in different situations
By being tolerant of different people
Respecting individuals
Not grouping everyone as enemies
Then and only then
It will start to change the world
Because in the end
Of all the fighting
What is left is
Bloody human-beings bleeding red
Dead because of blind hate

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Finding His Garden”

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Made too many left turns
Following people
Pretending to know
How to explain the bible
Found out
They were not his true followers
They did not understand his teachings
They were not walking his path
False prophets
They knew nothing
As to find his garden
Where there would be an abundance
Of what we needed
And
Not what we wanted
Waiting for us
So I had to walk away
To find what I was losing
And
It felt as if
I ran a marathon
Trying to find it
Heart pounding
Out of breath
Body sweating
Anxiety building
Not able to stand
Any longer
Legs weakening
From the heavy burden
Until
I asked for him to take over
So
He pushed me down
Taking over
To allow my body
To recover
Releasing everything
That did not belong to me
Off my shoulders
Out of my mind
Out of my heart
And
Out of my spirit
By slowing kneeling me
To a bented knee
With my hands clasped together
So I could ask for
His acceptance
His love
His forgiveness
For being lost and human

-Yellowbonewonda

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“Cause And Effect”

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Isolate yourself
So as to quarantine
The contagious virus
That is you
From the rest of us
Because we do not need
More craziness
We need a world with more sanity
It is enough danger
In this society
We do not need you
Carrying an epidemic of
sadness
Deception
Hopelessness
Which will infect the masses
With great destruction
Destroying the innocent
Giving plenty of heartache
If you are broken
You do not want to be fixed
Have balance
Peace of mind
And
Peace within your heart
Go somewhere else
Deep in a Forrest
Anywhere you can not
Hurt
Harm
Or
Endanger us
No more tears need to be shed
Unless it is tears of
Happiness

-Yellowbonewonda

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